Dear New GiT Spouse,
I’d like to dedicate my story to you, “the new one”, the one with the head full of questions about the experience that’s about to start – or that just started. Buckle up and enjoy the ride, there will 
be nothing but a true personal growth for you and your partner!
I’m Jenny Campos, 34 years old, Venezuelan. I was born and lived most of my life in Maracaibo, the capital of Zulia, Venezuela. We call this city “the land loved by the sun” (La tierra del sol amada). Where the sun shines all year long, the average temperature is above 35 °C and the sun rises and sets at the same time every day. Where going to the warm beach or to the outdoor swimming pool during the weekend is a plan valid through the entire year.
Therefore, I believe I have no need to further express my feelings for the Dutch weather. As you may presume, I don’t like it very much. But rest assured, you too will get used to it and you’ll embrace it as part of your daily life, like a true local. Biking in the pouring rain will be nothing but a common event. Cold winter days will be nice memories when the hottest summer days appear. The colours of spring will bring joy to your heart. And the orange of fall will make you want to sit in the park all day.
I came to The Netherlands on February 28th 2014: 4 years, 6 months and 15 days ago, including today, when I’m writing this note. Don’t worry I don’t count in years, months and days all the time – and you won’t either! Time passes by quickly and sometimes it is only Facebook’s “On this day…” Memories App that helps you remember how long it has been.
A lot has happened since the day I set foot in Schiphol Airport in 2014. I had been in this place before, in 2009 but as a tourist; this was my first time coming here as an Expat. Since my arrival to The Netherlands I’ve lived in Eindhoven and Utrecht. I’ve worked in Beverwijk and Rotterdam. And I’ve visited many other cities as a “normal” tourist. Trying to summarize all this time in a few paragraphs will be a challenge, but let’s see what I can do!
I will have to start a bit back, around mid-2012, when my husband and I talked about expanding our horizons and putting efforts to experience life abroad. Before the end of that year, not under any magical or casual circumstances, I quit my job as Process Superintendent at a Chemical Manufacturing Plant. I had been a year and a half in that position, and before four years as Process Engineer. As Chemical Engineer I loved my job and I was passionate about my career. But I needed a change and it came in good timing. After I quit my job I focused on finishing my post-graduate studies as a Safety Engineering Specialist. Additionally, I spent a lot of time looking for options abroad and preparing all the necessary documentation to migrate.
On December 6th 2013, I went to my graduation ceremony with my husband; he was also receiving a diploma, Magister Scientiarum in Chemical Engineering. Furthermore, we had our flight tickets in hand and plans set, destination: The Netherlands. During our graduation party we announced to family and friends that we were leaving in two months. This generated an indescribable mix of emotions, to say the least. Between tears, laughs and hugs we were ready for the new adventure.
My husband had found a position at TU/e as a PhD Candidate in the Department of Chemical Engineering and Chemistry. This is how and why I got introduced to the “Get-in-Touch program for the wives of TU/e internationals”. I still have the first email that was sent to my husband on January 13th, 2014; more than a month before I was arriving to The Netherlands. At no cost I would have the opportunity to “know a lot of others in Eindhoven, and get to know the city”. I didn’t hesitate to get involved. My GiT story started at that very moment when, leaving worries behind and with no agenda, I opened up for the new experience.
Having the opportunity to read again that first email, I noticed that the programme was supposed to last for three months. Good that it was at no cost for us, otherwise I would be in great debt with TU/e. Even to this day I continue to feel part of “Carola’s GiT Family”, and I think part of me will never leave. During the seven months I lived in Eindhoven, I got involved in as many activities as I could, both prepared by the program and by the other ladies I met in the group. From walks around the city, to activities in the Common Room, potlucks, language courses, special events and birthday celebrations; I always tried to be there. It was nice to be busy and to be around people that shared a similar story to yours.
In a very Dutch straight-forward way, it’s also true that you won’t like everyone and not everyone will like you. But it is what it is. You will have the opportunity to practice respect, tolerance and kindness. You will be challenged to accept how each individual deals with their experience and you will have the opportunity to learn how to be compassionate to them. I made great friends that are still present in my life; and I keep in touch with others, even if it’s only with a yearly message on their birthday through social media.
Reflecting back on my experience, something that helped me was that I created no expectations on how the group would work or what activities I wanted them to do. As long as I was busy, I was happy. Nevertheless, I did make my strategy around re-building my career in The Netherlands. Not only did I want to “feel independent” and make a contribution to my own family (…or more like take care of my own impulsive shopping expenses -joke-); I wanted to make sure I made a structure to continue my professional career path. Through GiT I was able to get in contact with a local recruiter and also with a life and career coach. Good, and not so good, experiences with these volunteers helped me strengthen my skills, both personal and professional, for the job market in The Netherlands. I was also enthusiastic about learning Dutch, and I enjoyed the classes provided by the program. They also helped me make connections to further develop the language skills.
Coincidentally, or not, my husband will have his PhD Defense in a week! When I got the email with Carola’s request I felt it was an opportunity for me to close the cycle as well. I have taken this occasion to carefully reflect and to internally give thanks to what brought me to this great group, and what I got in return from my commitment and time. I know I will always cherish the experiences because they made me grow and bear with this new world in a better way. My chapter with GiT prepared me for what would be, and still is, the rollercoaster life of an Expat in The Netherlands.
So, dear “New GiT Spouse”, give yourself the opportunity to integrate, share and collaborate. Receive this opportunity with open heart and open mind. Make of this your safe space, one of your happy places. I’m sure you won’t regret it. Above all, be grateful that you have the opportunity that many others could not get.
To this day I quote TU/e’s motto to its employees: “Happy Wife, Happy Life”, although for a long time I considered it a condescending thing to say directly to us (the wives). We too came a long way and made a lot of sacrifices to be here with our partners. No need to make us feel like a burden or a worry to our spouses, right? But things change, you grow, and now I reflect on it differently: My happiness is in my hands, and life provides great opportunities to be happy; in consequence, I see the life around me as a happy life.
So yes: Happy Wife, Happy Life! Let GiT provide you with the amount of happiness you need through this experience in your “home away from home”.
Jenny Campos
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