This is Humaira, always have been a friendly, outspoken person. I am from Bangladesh (Chittagong) and did my bachelor’s in Electrical and Electronic Engineering. I was a high school physics teacher in an international school before coming here. On 13th July, 2017 I got married with Siam who is currently doing PhD in TU/e. I paid a short visit to Netherlands for two months (October-November) to collect my residence permit. Then I went back to Bangladesh for my reception program. That time we moved to a new apartment in Eindhoven, went on a tour to Paris (first time for me) as well as different cities in Netherlands. When I returned to my country, being sad I saw so many snowy pictures on Facebook. I thought I missed it. Finally, I moved to Eindhoven on March,2018. After one week, I had not recovered from jetlag that time, woke up early to a mesmerizing view of snow as a magnificent carpet on the road in front of my house. I went out with my cousin who came to visit me and played with snow like children.
Ahhhhhhh!! What an incident!! We decided to settle here and did not want to feel like a tourist here. I like to be a part of an International community. Fortunately, immediately after coming here I came to know about “Get in Touch” program from Reffat, who also participated in different Git activities earlier and was very enthusiastic about it. I still remember the day Reffat introduced me to Carola saying, “you are going to enjoy this a lot because Carola is such a kind-hearted person”. That is how my journey begins in Get in Touch that occurs once a week. My first Git experience is unforgettable. It was a dance lesson where Thasni was teaching us Indian dance style. I met several spouses from different countries there and enjoyed a lot. That is the day I decided not to skip any other activities organized by Git. Moreover, I specially loved the ending session, where we talk about each other’s experience and interests regarding each day’s activity.
To be very honest, after coming here I was a bit worried about the new beginning of life, new place, new culture. I also wanted to get a new job. Instinctively, we fear change. Luckily, Git was there to assist and guide me. While joining the program, I was thinking it could be a great place to spend some good time. Nonetheless, I am truly happy to say that it is more than that. Throughout my journey I discovered so many useful things like Dutch culture, Chinese embroidery, decoupage, trips, career supporting classes, different dance styles, different cultures and their food and so on. I want to mention particularly two things, firstly I learned biking after coming here. A very big thanks to Megha who gave me time with care and taught me. Secondly, with the help of Carola I enrolled into Dutch class and our teacher Hermine is such a loving person. These helped me a lot to be familiar with Dutch culture. We, the spouses come from different countries with different cultures and languages, but with the same sentiment of leaving our families, adapting to a new culture, finding someone to share our uncertainty; Git represents our emotion, and this is what makes it exceptional.
To be very specific on my special moment regarding Git is when I told about my Git experience in my interview at Thermo Fisher Scientific and got the job (Yaaaaaay)!! Besides, we organized a potluck picnic at Speelpark de Splinter where we tasted different countries food and played like kids. That is one of the most memorable moments I will cherish forever.
I cannot thank enough the most beautiful person inside and outside “Carola” for taking initiative of such a lovely get together that helps women like us become more self-confident and grow together. To all the gorgeous ladies, who are part of Git, “Cheers to life and Git (good friends)!
I’d like to dedicate my story to you, “the new one”, the one with the head full of questions about the experience that’s about to start – or that just started. Buckle up and enjoy the ride, there will be nothing but a true personal growth for you and your partner!
I’m Jenny Campos, 34 years old, Venezuelan. I was born and lived most of my life in Maracaibo, the capital of Zulia, Venezuela. We call this city “the land loved by the sun” (La tierra del sol amada). Where the sun shines all year long, the average temperature is above 35 °C and the sun rises and sets at the same time every day. Where going to the warm beach or to the outdoor swimming pool during the weekend is a plan valid through the entire year.
Therefore, I believe I have no need to further express my feelings for the Dutch weather. As you may presume, I don’t like it very much. But rest assured, you too will get used to it and you’ll embrace it as part of your daily life, like a true local. Biking in the pouring rain will be nothing but a common event. Cold winter days will be nice memories when the hottest summer days appear. The colours of spring will bring joy to your heart. And the orange of fall will make you want to sit in the park all day.
I came to The Netherlands on February 28th 2014: 4 years, 6 months and 15 days ago, including today, when I’m writing this note. Don’t worry I don’t count in years, months and days all the time – and you won’t either! Time passes by quickly and sometimes it is only Facebook’s “On this day…” Memories App that helps you remember how long it has been.
A lot has happened since the day I set foot in Schiphol Airport in 2014. I had been in this place before, in 2009 but as a tourist; this was my first time coming here as an Expat. Since my arrival to The Netherlands I’ve lived in Eindhoven and Utrecht. I’ve worked in Beverwijk and Rotterdam. And I’ve visited many other cities as a “normal” tourist. Trying to summarize all this time in a few paragraphs will be a challenge, but let’s see what I can do!
I will have to start a bit back, around mid-2012, when my husband and I talked about expanding our horizons and putting efforts to experience life abroad. Before the end of that year, not under any magical or casual circumstances, I quit my job as Process Superintendent at a Chemical Manufacturing Plant. I had been a year and a half in that position, and before four years as Process Engineer. As Chemical Engineer I loved my job and I was passionate about my career. But I needed a change and it came in good timing. After I quit my job I focused on finishing my post-graduate studies as a Safety Engineering Specialist. Additionally, I spent a lot of time looking for options abroad and preparing all the necessary documentation to migrate.
On December 6th 2013, I went to my graduation ceremony with my husband; he was also receiving a diploma, Magister Scientiarum in Chemical Engineering. Furthermore, we had our flight tickets in hand and plans set, destination: The Netherlands. During our graduation party we announced to family and friends that we were leaving in two months. This generated an indescribable mix of emotions, to say the least. Between tears, laughs and hugs we were ready for the new adventure.
My husband had found a position at TU/e as a PhD Candidate in the Department of Chemical Engineering and Chemistry. This is how and why I got introduced to the “Get-in-Touch program for the wives of TU/e internationals”. I still have the first email that was sent to my husband on January 13th, 2014; more than a month before I was arriving to The Netherlands. At no cost I would have the opportunity to “know a lot of others in Eindhoven, and get to know the city”. I didn’t hesitate to get involved. My GiT story started at that very moment when, leaving worries behind and with no agenda, I opened up for the new experience.
Having the opportunity to read again that first email, I noticed that the programme was supposed to last for three months. Good that it was at no cost for us, otherwise I would be in great debt with TU/e. Even to this day I continue to feel part of “Carola’s GiT Family”, and I think part of me will never leave. During the seven months I lived in Eindhoven, I got involved in as many activities as I could, both prepared by the program and by the other ladies I met in the group. From walks around the city, to activities in the Common Room, potlucks, language courses, special events and birthday celebrations; I always tried to be there. It was nice to be busy and to be around people that shared a similar story to yours.
In a very Dutch straight-forward way, it’s also true that you won’t like everyone and not everyone will like you. But it is what it is. You will have the opportunity to practice respect, tolerance and kindness. You will be challenged to accept how each individual deals with their experience and you will have the opportunity to learn how to be compassionate to them. I made great friends that are still present in my life; and I keep in touch with others, even if it’s only with a yearly message on their birthday through social media.
Reflecting back on my experience, something that helped me was that I created no expectations on how the group would work or what activities I wanted them to do. As long as I was busy, I was happy. Nevertheless, I did make my strategy around re-building my career in The Netherlands. Not only did I want to “feel independent” and make a contribution to my own family (…or more like take care of my own impulsive shopping expenses -joke-); I wanted to make sure I made a structure to continue my professional career path. Through GiT I was able to get in contact with a local recruiter and also with a life and career coach. Good, and not so good, experiences with these volunteers helped me strengthen my skills, both personal and professional, for the job market in The Netherlands. I was also enthusiastic about learning Dutch, and I enjoyed the classes provided by the program. They also helped me make connections to further develop the language skills.
Coincidentally, or not, my husband will have his PhD Defense in a week! When I got the email with Carola’s request I felt it was an opportunity for me to close the cycle as well. I have taken this occasion to carefully reflect and to internally give thanks to what brought me to this great group, and what I got in return from my commitment and time. I know I will always cherish the experiences because they made me grow and bear with this new world in a better way. My chapter with GiT prepared me for what would be, and still is, the rollercoaster life of an Expat in The Netherlands.
So, dear “New GiT Spouse”, give yourself the opportunity to integrate, share and collaborate. Receive this opportunity with open heart and open mind. Make of this your safe space, one of your happy places. I’m sure you won’t regret it. Above all, be grateful that you have the opportunity that many others could not get.
To this day I quote TU/e’s motto to its employees: “Happy Wife, Happy Life”, although for a long time I considered it a condescending thing to say directly to us (the wives). We too came a long way and made a lot of sacrifices to be here with our partners. No need to make us feel like a burden or a worry to our spouses, right? But things change, you grow, and now I reflect on it differently: My happiness is in my hands, and life provides great opportunities to be happy; in consequence, I see the life around me as a happy life.
So yes: Happy Wife, Happy Life! Let GiT provide you with the amount of happiness you need through this experience in your “home away from home”.
My name is Ágnes Borza and I am from Hungary, from Budapest. I am a mathematician and I have been living with my partner in Eindhoven since September 2017.
I met with my boyfriend in 2012 at the university. We first became friends, later we fell in love with each other. We never wanted to move abroad. However, after the master studies (summer 2017) he received a PhD opportunity in Eindhoven. Because we wanted to stay together we decided to move to The Netherlands together. We can say that we are lucky because Hungary is in the EU, so we did not have any major documentary problems, and it was easy to move.
After we moved out we had to learn a lot. We moved from our parents for the first time, and immediately to a foreign country. We couldn’t visit the introductory week, so I didn’t know about GiT. However, the university sent us an e-mail describing that a sport program for partners starts in October in the university sports center. Because the sport plays an important role in my life, I was enthusiastic about it, but the beginning of the program was shifted to January because of the instructor’s surgery. So I stayed alone at home on weekdays. I was terribly bored and I had a big homesick. I missed my family and my friends. It made me worse that I didn’t get a job, I couldn’t occupy myself.
But in January the sport program started, where I felt very happy. Several girls mentioned that there is another group and I should join. So I got to know about GiT, which changed my life! On the one hand I have a weekly program where we get to know a lot of interesting things. On the other hand I realized I am not alone! The girls are in the same situation like me. Almost everyone is highly educated and graduated but without job. We can’t find a job. They helped me to understand that the problem is not with me. We are all here to support our partners and live with them.
At the beginning I was afraid to go to my first meeting. I was afraid I didn’t speak English very well and this would be a problem. That everybody knows each other except me and I will just sit there and I will not feel good. But that didn’t happen! Everyone was incredibly kind to me and very receptive. Several people told me they were already in Budapest, which was my heart’s delight. Because I love my city, my country and I really want to go back.
Since I’ve been a member of GiT, I feel better. Every week I wait for the day when we finally meet. We talk a lot, laugh, share our joy and sorrow. Sometimes we meet in the city or at our place of residence. Many members live in the same building.
We made handicraft things many times that I enjoy very much. That’s why I invited Megha to our apartment because she likes these things too and we sewed a patchwork pattern together. It would be good to organize such occasions and involve other members who would like to join. Sometimes we might even try new techniques. Everyone would show what she knows and teach the others.
Decoupage workshop
I’ve been living in Eindhoven for almost a year. The girls helped me a lot this time. I still have some homesick and I’m still trying to find a job. But my mood is much better, thanks to GiT.
